Quitter

Yes, once again I have left a job. If anyone knows me then they are sure to say 'again?'. Yes! Again. I have quite a rap sheet of different jobs in my ten year working career. I have worked in places from anywhere between 7 weeks and 5 years. I have made sandwiches to listening to hear people complain about their phone contracts. I have sold beauty products to handling million pound business accounts. I have had my fair share of jobs, however I have only ever quit a job once without having another job lined up (the job I quit was soul destroying). I have also never been fired.

People make think (and have often commented) I am just a quitter, that I am not loyal and also that they can't believe that I am hireable after having so many jobs. Shut up. I don't see myself as a quitter. No two jobs have ever been the same. You know what I see myself as? A tryer (I am aware this isn't a real word but bear with me). I try different things to see what fits. You don't buy a shirt without trying it on do you? Even if you took it home and it didn't fit, you would take it back. For me that is what a job is like. I try them out, I see what fits me. If it doesn't fit me then I leave. How can I be good for a company if I don't like been there? How can I be good for a company if I am miserable? How can I be good for a company if I am constantly wanting to be somewhere else? A company, I am sure, wants employees who love the job, who thrive in their workplace and are happy. I am wasting their time and resources and my own by taking the place of someone who could benefit the company.

People will take one job and stay there forever. This can be for multiple reasons. Some people are content with having a secure pay cheque coming in every month regardless of what they have do for it. Some people have to stay in a job because they have such responsibilities outside of the workplace that it is the smart thing to do. Some people are lucky that they find their dream job straight out the gate. I am none of these people. I am lucky that I have quite a comfortable home life that if I don't bring home a cheque I will be okay. I will always have a roof over my head, food in the fridge and drinks a plenty - I never take this for granted. I don't have any responsibilities except myself and shared custody of a 15 year old cat. I don't know what my dream is, I never have. I have flitted around different ideas. At 16 we are supposed to start deciding what we want the rest of our life to be, I wasn't fortunate to be one of those that had a plan, and it sucks the big one. I wish I had a plan, or at least an outline of what my future could be. All I know is that  love to write and thats what I want to pursue (not just to learn how to achieve this).

So, to any future employers. Yes I have had multiple jobs over time, there are a lot of negative connotations to this I know; let me tell you the positives. I am applying for your job vacancy because I honestly believe it is something I will enjoy and it is something I can do. I have never left a job to go to something I don't think I will like. I leave with every good intention. I want to find somewhere I am comfortable, with great people and great personal rewards. I am a hard worker, I used to work 7 days a week and never complained about it. Plus, think of my experience - I have done so much, worked in so many different environments.  I have worked days and nights, I have worked national holidays, I have worked away from home.

I must be doing something right, one job took me back 3 times.

A Quick Update from Craig

I don't know if a lot of people like to be kept up to date with what I am doing, but I like to sometimes just ramble about myself and I find this a good outlet. I don't live a very exciting life, much to my own detriment, but just like everyone else I have a lot going on inside of me.

I haven't wrote anything on here since April 21st. One of the main reasons is that I lost my Photoshop and I didn't think I could create a a post with out a little homemade image at the very top of it. This is going to look very odd in comparison to my other posts. There have been many things that I have wanted to write about so I will make a quick list for you now.

1. Caitlyn Jenner - I am immensely proud of her, what she is doing is incredibly brave. I can't imagine living a life that wasn't for me for so long and then make that change. Fix what needed fixing. I am in awe of her, she is beautiful, a trailblazer and an inspiration to many.

2. Facebook fasting - Me and my friend decided to take ourselves off Facebook for a week. I accidently did it for 9 days. And accept for the fomo (fear of missing out), it didn't affect me at all. I was actually happier without it. I didn't have any sources to compare myself to my friends/friends of friends and it was freeing. One bad thing did come from it though - I missed the announcement of the Dixie Chick's UK tour and by the time I heard about it there was only bad seats left. So overall the week had perks and flaws.

3. Vegetarianism - Thats right, Craig is now meat free. I have been officially 100% vegetarian for 5 days now, but for the past few weeks I have slowly been weeding animal products out of my life. I know it isn't exactly a long time but for me it is a big deal. For someone that considered Ronald McDonald and the Colonel as family it has been tough, but day by day it is getting easier and easier. The dream is to one day be free of all animal products and become vegan - but baby steps.

4. I had a relationship - I don't know if thats what it can be called as it kind of happened and ended rather quickly. It is a shame it had to end, but when it isn't right it isn't right. So still holding out for my prince to come and sweep me up, put that glass slipper on my adorable feet and live happily ever after.

5. I got a new job - I am back in retail! For the time been I am working in a clothing shop once again. My last job wasn't for me, so I chose happiness over money (stupid I know). I couldn't make myself pick up a phone and listen to someone moan for hours at a time about something I just didn't care about. However, this job I can do and I can do well. Is it forever? I don't know. Maybe one day someone will pay me to do something fun but that just seems like a dream right now.

6. Grace & Frankie -  I don't know why I didn't watch this as soon as it was uploaded, but my days I am so glad I finally watched it. The fact it stars 2/3 of the cast of one of the best films of all time (9 to 5) should have been a big enough push for me to watch it from the jump. It was hilarious, heart warming and has given me more catchphrases to slide in to everyday conversation.

So that was just a few things that have ran through my mind or happened to me in the last few weeks. I am going to try and be more frequent with my posts because I absolutely love writing and this one of my few outlets for it. I am going to try and get over my fear of not having photoshop to complete my posts.

R.E.S.P.E.C.T - Find out what it means to Me

One thing that is very important to me is respect. We all have the ability to give it and we should all strive to receive it. However, lately I have been struggling with respect a lot.

I constantly try my best at what I do, wether it be a friend, an employee or a member of a family but I am struggling. I often feel like I am not respected. I don't know if it is something I am doing wrong. I don't feel like I am doing anything wrong, I kind of feel that I am not appreciated because I don't stand out or I haven't changed my ways in a long time, people have gotten complacent with me.

I feel like I am quite a respectful person. I listen to everyone, I do as I am told and I try my best not to hurt anyone. I think that is just the basics of been a good human being. Sometimes though I just feel like if I wasn't there (wherever 'there' may be) it wouldn't make much of a difference. I am like a supporting character in a sitcom. I could be taken out and nothing would change. My problem comes from the fact that I like to shine, I like being the centre of attention. As big headed as that may sound, just ask yourself - don't you like attention for all the good things you do?

I don't want the sun to shine out of my arse, I don't want constant praise but it would be nice to get some reassurance sometimes. Just to be told that I am a good friend, or that I did a good job. I am rereading what I just wrote and I know I am coming across a bit moany, but it is something that has been weighing on my mind recently. I have noticed a lot lately that sometimes when I speak it isn't even acknowledged. I will be the only one saying something or asking something and there will be no reply - as if it was dead silence when I opened my mouth. I am just a normal person that likes to be heard and someone who likes to be re-assured when they do something well and given constructive criticism when I am not.

I suffer a lot with self confidence, if you know me you may be giving me the side eye right now as I can come across as a bit loud, sarcastic sometimes - but it is an act. I have been doing it my whole life because it comes easy to me. It is easier for me to be the joke then it is for me strive to be something that I am not. So this is where respect becomes a must for me, I want to be respected for what I do, so maybe I don't have to be so loud and annoying.

I had a job recently, and it was my review. There was not one comment about the work I did - instead I was pulled apart for my appearance and personality. And it wasn't work based opinions, it was her personal opinion. Where was the respect in that? She wasn't giving me anything constructive, just plain telling me everything she didn't like about me. That was a few months ago and it has stuck with me, like I said before I don't want people bowing down and kissing my arse, I just would like to be acknowledged and respected. You don't have to like me, but you will respect me.