Recently I have discovered the word 'No'. I have been saying it for years, especially when it comes to things such as salad and exercise, but now I realise the power that comes from it. You can say it to things that are expected of you. You can say it to things that people want you to do. It is your life and you get to decide how it goes.
In recent months I have been struggling with certain aspects of my life. I accepted them for what they were and just went along with them. It came to a point where I was miserable, so one day I just said 'no'. The weight that felt lifted from my shoulders was glorious. Yes, I have let people down and haven't met expectations, but who the hell cares? I am going to do what I want to do from now on. I only get one chance to do what I wanted to do and I took it. With most things in life you can go back, if you feel like you made a mistake later down the line it is never too late. So right now I made a decision which will impact certain things but I am so much happier from it.
We are stuck in a society that expects certain things from us. We are expected to go to school, get a job and live happily ever after in an existence that might not be for you. You stick to the status quo and everyone is happy. Well not me, I don't want a life that is already mapped out. I don't want to do what everyone else does. I don't have a 5 year plan, hell I don't even know what I am doing next week - and I love that. I like the unpredictable and unexpected. This is where 'no' has become so important. I have said 'no' to things that should automatically be a 'yes'.
I am not standing here on my little soap box asking you to follow my lead. The way I like to do things may not be what everyone likes. People may find happiness and security in knowing what to do in their lives. Sometimes I wish I could aswell, but I always yearn for something else. My Dad has always said when I start something new 'I give it 3 weeks'. This is so true because thats when I start to get bored and I want to move on. I am a restless person, I just want to live a life filled with spontaneity, adventure, beauty and creativity.
'I don’t wanna do it. It’s really liberating to say no to shit you hate. So you go ahead, you go live your truth. I’ll be here living my truth.' - Lena Dunham, Girls
I watch a whole lot of TV, a lot more than a human should. So it pains me when I can't talk to people about my interests, my acquaintances are just not on my level (perhaps they have a social life). So, as I am a giver, I thought I would talk about 8 TV shows that people should be watching so I won't feel like such a loser.
Bates Motel
'Psycho' is one of my favourite films of all time. It is genius and has more than stood the test of time. So when it was announced a TV show would be made that was inspired by it I jumped on it. At first I was sceptical because I am a firm believer that some things should be left alone - boy was I wrong. This show tells the story of Norman Bates before 'Psycho' but it has been set in modern times. The star of the show for me is Norma Bates played amazingly and perfectly by Vera Farmiga. Freddie Highmore plays Norman extremely well and I applaud the show for showing us the early signs of his crazy in such a great way. Watch it!
Impractical Jokers
In a nut shell this is a prank show. I don't normally watch these shows since 'Jackass' as I didn't think they could be topped, and they all seemed like copycat shows trying to best the best. Boy am I glad I gave this one a chance. It features 4 life long friends from New York, they are middle aged with an amazing sense of humour and lack of shame. The difference about this show is that they don't try and humiliate people, they strictly humiliate themselves. The tasks will make you cringe and crease with laughter. Watch it!
RuPaul's Drag Race
I have done a whole post before dedicated to this show, but I feel I should mention it again. Basically it is a drag version of a talent show. It is perfect. We have drama, touching moments and what I feel every show should have - lip synch battles!!! It has introduced the world to an art form often mocked and misunderstood, along with laughs-a-plenty plus fabulous men with a talent we should all see and admire. Watch it!
The Following
Nowadays there is a cop show for everyone. Any angle of the justice system you want to watch you can. This show concentrates more on the crime then the technique to catch the bad guy. The story is about a mass-murderer who has a cult following, so whilst the killer is behind bars his wishes are still being granted by the masses. SPOILER ALERT the bad guy escapes prison with a vendetta against the guy who captured him. Plus the show stars Kevin Bacon who we all love (except from those dreadful phone adverts) so this show is great. Watch it!
The Bad Girls Club
This is another show I cannot shut up about and have also dedicated an entire post to. This show has everything. It has drama, it has comedy, it has tragedy, it has fighting, it has making up, it has ratchetness and it also has some classy girls. Basically 7 self confessed 'bad girls' are put into a house. Nothing else to it - they just have to live together. Watch it!
Parks And Recreation
It baffles me that this show isn't bigger than what it is. It stars the amazing Amy Poehler as Lesley Knope, she is the assistant manager of the parks department in her local council. I laugh out loud at every episode. A quick hint - don't watch the first season first, I love this show but it definitely hit its stride in season 2 (watch season 1 after, you will just understand it more then). It is shot in a documentary style so there are lots of awkward moments caught which I love. Its one of those comedies with a heart and those are my favourite kind. Watch it!
Orange Is The New Black
Anyone with out a Netflix account is seriously missing out. This show is genius. It centres around a pretty middle class woman being sent to jail for drug charges she received 10 years prior. The show has its funny moments as well as its sad moments. It comes with drama and an extreme sense of sisterhood. I wasn't sure how great a TV show could be that was made for the internet, but I was extremely pleasantly surprised. I fell in love and binge watched it in a day. Watch it!
Girls
I'm pretty sure everyone has heard of this show now, its just no one seems to be talking about it with me - and I have a lot to talk about. The show centres around 4 young women finding their way through Brooklyn, New York. It is a realistic approach at how women of this age think and act. Lena Dunham created and stars in this show, she is genius. I laugh with them in their awkward moments and cry with them in their sad moments. Plus I live for Shoshanna, she is everything. Watch it!
Watch them all, thank me later with money and food.
I hear 'Man Up!' way too many times in my life. I am one of those people that kind of blur the lines of gender. I don't mean in any way that I consider myself part woman. What I mean is that I have interests and qualities that once upon a time were considered a woman's. I enjoy things that maybe I shouldn't. And isn't that a damn shame that certain things can't be for one person but can be for another. Who made these rules?
When we were children it was pushed on to us what we should be in to. Boy's clothes are blue and girl's are pink, in Toys R Us there was an aisle for boys with dinosaurs, cars and Power Rangers, and in the girl's aisle they had Barbies, toy prams and My Little Pony. I never quite understood why they were so segregated. A child should be allowed to play what with what they want with out our judgement.
In later life we stepped out of Toys R Us and we were still assumed to be playing with our gender ruled choices. As a teen boy I was expected to kick a football around. This isn't me and never was. Sports are completely lost on me. I am happy for someone who succeeds but don't expect me to watch it. Selfish I know but I prefer to spend my time on something I enjoy.
Growing up I gained a love for fashion, I particularly enjoyed women's fashion. I never wore it and probably never will but I would buy Vogue, Elle and Nylon so I could see it. Its like art for me and I appreciate it on a whole other level than whether I could wear it or not. My music taste isn't particularly masculine, I enjoy female singing voices so much more than a man's and 90% of the concerts I have ever been to have been fronted by a woman. When I am watching TV, the shows I am watching are more likely to have a female lead - I don't know why and to be honest why do I need an answer?
So tell me what makes a man? Someone with a thirst for war? Someone who loves nothing more than a pint and football game? Someone who fights? Someone who doesn't show emotion? I am sorry but that isn't me. These stereotypes are ruining people's lives. We all try to fit something in a box; in society we need to be able to label something before we can accept it as it is. I don't know if its just the way I think (or that fact I don't fit in any particular box) but I don't understand why. In this day and age it is a shame that we can't just let things go. You see a boy playing with a Barbie and it is still weird. You see a girl kicking a football around with a bunch of boys and we call her a tomboy.
I have been blessed in my family life, my parents let me be whoever I wanted to be. Nothing shocks them anymore with me. Just today I was watching a drag queen performing and told my Dad my thoughts on it - no he didn't care about it at all but he still listened. My sister is an avid supporter of football and she doesn't care at all that I would prefer to be reading Vogue. My Mum will come to me for fashion advise because she knows I have an opinion on it. We all just get on with things in our house and gender doesn't rule anything. I would be miserable any other way, and they love me just the way I am.
I think it is impossible to describe what a man should be. You call a man strong? Why isn't a woman? You call a woman beautiful? Why can't a man be? A man should provide for his family - why? Can we not get over this caveman mentality of men hunting and women looking after the home.
So right here right now I am taking a stand. I am a man. I have an adams apple and no ovaries. Who cares what my interests are? I am not choosing what I enjoy to piss any one else off. I don't have a definition for a man or a woman that goes any further than a medical dictionary would. At the end of the day that is the only thing we have in common, whatever we have going on inside of us or sticking out of us doesn't mean we should be any which way.
My name is Craig. I study fashion. I never watch sports. I have seen every episode of America's Next Top Model. I have aspirations to work in female fashion. I like to gossip. People like Sandra Bullock, Beyonce and Taylor Swift are some of my favourite people. I will go clothes shopping with my Mum. I cry at every episode of Grey's Anatomy. I am a man.
The Urban Dictionary defines a Frenemy as 'The type of "friend" whose words or actions bring you down.(whether you realise it as intentional or not) The type of friend you ought to cut off but don't because ... they're nice ... good ... you've had good times with them. You know they're good people that you can count on to bring you down again sometime in the near future.'
So why do we keep them around? Why do we do it to ourselves? We should only concern ourselves with people that benefit us. I do not mean this in a selfish way, but I guess maybe in someways I do. Let me explain, we only get one spin on this Earth so lets not waste it. Lets not give our energy or time to someone who is only there to make you feel shit about yourself. When I talk about someone who benefits us I simply mean someone who adds a positive to your life. Someone who gives you the odd compliment, someone who praises you successes , someone who will help you with your failures and even someone that has the rare quality of been excited for something good that is happening to you even if it doesn't affect them. I don't think this is selfish to expect at all, we are all human and able to do these things.
A sad fact is that you're best friend yesterday can be your frenemy tomorrow. Something can change and they can turn sour. Often they will even blame you for it and say that YOU changed or that they finally see 'the real you'. Don't be afraid to call bullshit on this. If you know deep down that you didn't change and even if you did it was for personal growth - then it is their problem, don't try and win someone back by actually changing or reverting. This person may even be delusional and think they are helping you out by giving you the 'truth', they can do one. This person is a poison and you need to be cured instantly.
Cutting someone off can be extremely hard, but believe me it is so worth it in the end. I probably did do it the cowardly way and I just stopped replying - they eventually got it. However, I don't care I am so much happier and freer because of it. I consider myself a lucky person, I have amazing friends who actually seem to want to hang out with me. We may not even speak for months at a time, but for me thats ok. I was never that person that needed a friend handcuffed to me. I have people that can help me if I ever need it and I hope they know I would drop anything to go and help them.
I guess what I am saying is that we should only ever surround ourselves with good people. People who you love and people that love you back. Forget everyone else, this is your turn on this planet and you get to decide how you experience it. Never accept this blurred line of a frenemy - it is better to have an enemy who honestly says they don't like you, than to have a friend who says it behind your back. Don't fear the enemy that attacks you, but the fake friend who hugs you.
Main characters are great, but the characters I enjoy the most are the supporting roles. I think this because they are allowed to be the eccentric ones, the crazy characters that can say and do anything they want. In any show you need the comic relief, if it was left to the main characters then shows would be pretty boring and we would get over them pretty fast. So as the ever helpful person who is obsessed with lists I have taken the time to talk about 10 of my favourite supporting actresses (my top 10 male supporting actors might follow later).
1. Shoshanna Shapiro (Girls)
I know we are supposed to believe that all four 'Girls' are the main characters but lets face facts - Lena Dunham's favourite character is Hannah! She gives her own character about 80% of the screen time (I'm not mad about it at all - the show is amazing). My favourite character is definitely Shoshanna, to describe her in a sentence I would probably say she is woman with a unique look on the world, slightly naive, slightly immature but extremely loveable and hysterical. If you want a sneak peak of how great this character is then watch season 3 episode 2 - she was perfect.
2. Bonnie Wheeler (Baby Daddy)
Probably a show you have never watched or even heard of. It came out in 2012 in America and it is rather funny. The basic premise is that a young guy has a one night stand and 9 months later the mother drops off a baby and then she bolts. This show has many good moments and about 99% are Bonnie's. She is the Grandmother to the baby. She has no inhibitions, reckons herself as a bit of a cougar and she is absolutely hilarious. I hope to be as shameless as her as I age.
3. Amy Farrah Fowler (The Big Bang Theory)
Why this character was not written in from the start I will never know. She is perfection. I will forever be looking for my own Amy. She is a sexually frustrated scientist on her way to been comfortable in social situations. Her personality is flawless and her wit is beautiful. I love you Miss Fowler.
4. Dalia Royce (Suburgatory)
She is the dry, emotionless ultimate mean girl. She is played perfectly by Carly Chaikin. She makes me laugh every time she in screen. She doesn't care who she upsets aslong as she gets what she wants - and she always gets what she wants. There are so many great supporting female characters on this show but she is my favourite. She also has her moments where she touches you and she has brought a tear to my eye a few times.
5. Christina Yang (Grey's Anatomy)
For me she is the star of the show. Playing best friend to the title character can put her in a box of being the supporter and confidant - however she broke the mould. She is a sarcastic, straight talking son of a gun. She takes no shit and knows what she wants. My favourite thing will always be her wit, she just doesn't care.
6. Carol Miller (The Millers)
She could probably be considered a main role but lets be honest - its all about Will Arnett on that show. Carol plays his mother who is currently going through a divorce and she moves in with him. Cut to a montage of them being on the treadmill together - talk about laughing out loud, it got me. My favourite scene, possibly of any show, has to be when she and her kids almost re-enact the famous speech from 'A Few Good Men' - video below.
7. Karen Walker (Will & Grace)
The ultimate supporting character in my books. The bitch with a heart. She is the funniest character from any show. My love for her is unconditional - I don't know what else to say.
8. April Ludgate-Dwyer (Parks and Recreation)
The Queen of deadpan comedy and witty one liners. In a show with Amy Poehler in, it has been a challenge for me to notice other people (my love for Amy is deep and its real) but April stood out from the get-go. I think I resonate with April quite a lot as I have similar attitude as in I don't like doing what I should be doing, I question and moan whenever I am forced to do something. The fact she found love with Andy just multiplied my admiration for the girl.
9. Madison Montgomery (American Horror Story: Coven)
In a show jam packed with amazing actresses it was hard to choose one. I am so happy Ryan Murphy cast Emma Roberts in this role. She plays the heartless bitch flawlessly. She has been through a lot of shit in the show (been killed probably was the lowest point) but she got back up again (literally) and stuck a middle finger up to the world because at the end of the day its her world and we are just living in it. I really hope she is the Supreme.
10. Bonnie Plunkett (Mom)
She is the mother of the main character Christy. Bonnie is an ex-alcoholic and ex-drug addict, who has changed her ways and is now living on her daughter's couch. She is blunt, honest and a strong willed woman. She takes no flack and will fight for everything that is important to her, plus she does it with hilarity and style. Her one liners make this show for me and she is with no doubt my favourite character from the show.
Hello, my name is Craig and I am addicted to Apple Products. I love my iPhone, my iPad and my MacBook; they are the closest things to children that I have. And yes as I typed that I realised how sad I sound, I could of hit that backspace button - but no, I will own my sad little life as I am trying this new thing called honesty. I love gadgets, I just don't have the funds to support my habit. I am constantly on one or the other of my Apple products, you will at least see one of them in my hand at all times.
What spurred this blog post was that I just finished watching 'Her' starring Joaquin Phoenix, Amy Adams, Scarlett Johansson, Rooney Mara and Chris Pratt. It was a great film, the general outline is that Joaquin's character falls in love with the operating system (Samantha) of his home computer and phone. The film obviously has a lot more depth than that one sentence delved in to. You should definitely check it out. Anyway, it got me thinking. This film is supposed to be science fiction but of all the sci-fi films I have seen this one definitely stands out as one that could easily happen. We already have Siri, so what is to stop Apple in giving her/him a personality to match each and every individual customer?
I started to think just how much technology is in our lives these days. This lead me to question myself in particular and how I have changed my habits over the years. First of all my Dad buys the paper everyday and every morning I would sit and read it, now I wake up and check Facebook - I have no idea what is happening in the world unless someone posts about it. I check Twitter and Perez Hilton for celeb gossip instead of reading glossy magazines. I go on style.com instead of buying Vogue (okay I still buy it occasionally so I can get some tear sheets). I now download music instead of buying CD's. I now use Netflix or BBC iPlayer instead of watching TV. I order food from the internet instead of cooking or calling a take-away. I buy my clothes off ASOS instead of going into a shop. I buy 90% of my books from Amazon instead of a book store. I even tried online dating instead of meeting people the 'normal' way (it didn't work out, single till I die it seems) Its all about the ease of it, I literally don't have to move as the world comes to me.
It is so crazy how much the world has changed in recent years when it comes to communicating. So long are the days where you have to wait to hear through the grape vine that someone is pregnant - because BAM I get the due date, the sex, the weight and the potential names within seconds it seems of someone becoming pregnant. I know don't have to wonder what someone is doing these days because within a few clicks my 'Catfish' skills tell me everything. One thing that does annoy me about technology is concerts. They don't mix. At least 25% of the audience will watch the entire concert through a phone screen, put your phone down and live it! Obviously the people who film their favourite songs don't bother me, but if I find myself behind them at a concert I am watching their screens (often judging their lack of photography skills). Some things should be experienced with eyes not a camera. 'Oh wow, did you see that?', 'No, my camera doesn't shoot that wide' - this must be a problem for the amateur concert videographer.
So to wrap up, I love technology and every advancement excites me and the little nerd who lives inside of me. Secretly I do hope to be alive for the flying chairs and obesity in 'Wall-E', but right now I will settle for my MacBook and an office chair.
Below I was writing about male music acts that I love, and in shock I realised I forgot one major act who I absolutely love - THIRTY SECONDS TO MARS. I often forget things when I make my little lists and I normally just let them go, but I couldn't let this go. I have the biggest man crush on Jared Leto, I am not ignoring Shannon and Tomo from the band - but the heart wants what it wants. These are my five reasons why I love the man we call Jared. (side note - I could talk about him for a day easily, this is a quick list)
1. Thirty Seconds To Mars
He is the front man for this great band. His vocals are superb and he is an amazing show man. Watch any live performance from the band and you will understand what I mean. The band's music is so special, every song is powerful wether with the message or just the pure power all 3 of them have. Their music videos are inspiring, each one is a mini movie all of its own
2. His Acting
Not just an amazing singer but also a celebrated actor. He doesn't do many films, but when he does my god he picks roles that are perfect for him. He is obviously picking the right roles because this year alone he won a Golden Globe and has also been nominated for an Oscar. Good luck for March 2nd!
3. His Transformations
This could probably go under the heading for acting but I felt it was deserved of its own paragraph. Just check out the images for 'Chapter 27' - that is him! He is barely recognisable. And that isn't a fat suit that is all him. On the other scale look at images of him for 'Dallas Buyers Club', he fasted and lost a tonne of weight. It is scary and impressive how dedicated he is to his work.
4. He Cares
He isn't just one of those celebs that say how much they support or are against something, he actually does stuff. For example his tour was completely environmentally sound, he filmed one of his music videos 200 miles north of the Arctic Circle to showcase the damage of global warming whilst working with a environmental company to minimise their own impact whilst filming and he is often showing support for many organisations, including one that created a law against animal cruelty.
5. The Body
Allow me to be crude for a minute, his body! When he isn't slimming down or fattening up he can be seen sporting one of the best torsos I have ever seen. He must live in a gym when not doing all of his amazing things. I am equally jealous and appreciative.
